New Journey

I thought the next time I wrote, it would be about how I got back into the swing of things. I have stepped out of the competition lifestyle and  have been striving to get back to a "normal" routine. But today I will be sharing with you new journey, one that has been very difficult for me recently. I hope to give a glimpse into my next journey. During this time I ask for your prayers and support. Please take a moment, if you haven't already done so, to check out the guest blogger on my page about cancer.

Many of you may know that I have a friend fighting stage four ovarian cancer.  Cindy and I became friends through real estate (for a short time I sold real estate upon arriving in Asheville). Cindy and Ray, her husband, were referred to my families real estate company five years ago. They had just married (Ray a widower and Cindy divorcee) and were looking at homes. They decided not to move and we soon became great friends. Cindy and I connected on so many levels.  She is a nurse with a big heart, who is sweet, kind and just a joy to be around. She did not have children of her own but I felt a strong kinship with her. If I could of adopted her I would of.

We have spent most Thursday's together for the past year and half since the diagnosis. I cherish these Thursday "get togethers", it has been as much for her as it has been for me. I have so enjoyed the protected time we have had together and the fun things we have done. About eight weeks ago Cindy went back into the hospital and spent seven weeks there. After being released for two short weeks, she reentered the hospital again. She left this past Friday after being told they could no longer stop the cancer. Her life would be coming to a close and any fighting would only give her a small amount of additional time.

That Friday, my perspective and life changed has changed.  I now realized a dear friend would not be able to stay here with me and would not survive this disease. This is probably one of the most challenging times in my life and after the summer I have had it just seemed a bit surreal.  I couldn't believe how difficult this is for me, but even more important how difficult this must be for Cindy. It has been hard for me not to question what I am suppose to learn through all of this and how I can grow stronger. I have never felt such sorrow and I am really trying to find a balance between grieving and living.

My hope is to take that little bit of time I have left with her and add value to her time left on earth. I want to be a constant source of support for her.  During this time, I must make sure that I will be strong enough emotional and physically.  I can see how easy it is to neglect yourself when things get too hectic.  I have really began to focus on "Worrying about what I can do and not what I can't do".

For those who have take the time to read this, I thank you. I hope you will pray for Cindy, as I can not imagine the gravity that this must be for her and for anyone fighting cancer. All that I can do is remain strong for her. I also hope you will also recognize that the time you spend here on this Earth is short and the value you offer is so critical.  I pray that each of you will live life well and never give up.